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I spent the weekend back in Ann Arbor

Jordan 2017-04-04

I told my mom I missed my friends. And that I’m not sure whether home is California or Michigan now. She said “how do you think Dad and I feel? China is so much farther.”

Damn, one-upped.

“Your relationships are like a tree, Jordan,” she said. Okay, I know where this is going. You start at the trunk and slowly branches grow out, right? But they’re all still connected to the trunk, just like how you can never outgrow your home town. She continued, “but this tree has several sets of roots connected to different trunks. And when you water one set of roots you start to feel like that’s the main trunk, but then you go and water another set and you think that new set is the main trunk!”

“Wait what? Why are there multiple trunks? I don’t think a tree is the right comparison, Mom.” We laughed. It really was a shit metaphor.

Here’s a metaphor for you. I never learned the positions of the stars in a Michigan night. But when I look at the stars here I can still tell that they’re different. I find this to be symbolic in a deep way, as an Aries.

I haven’t been dating. I don’t think I am the type who can woo someone with a quick interaction. But I do think that if you were forced to spend several hours a day with me I could probably win you over. This probably explains why my friends are all from choirs, as well as the whole of my personality. I am optimized for the opposite of wooing. Hence this blog.

I thought about asking Nicole about the boy she is dating. I promptly decided that I really didn’t want to know. Worst case, things are going great and I feel like crap. Best case they are no longer dating and I feel happy briefly before feeling like crap for feeling happy. Wait, actually, the best case is they are no longer dating and I don’t feel guilty at all for how happy I am about it. Is it too much to ask for a legitimate reason to antagonize them? Something to make me the sympathetic dumped instead of an immature kid going through his first breakup? Because here I’m stuck with reasons only an asshole would consider, and its tantalizingly easy to be an asshole about it. (Hence this blog.)

Choir starts again tomorrow. Hopefully I can trick someone into liking me again. Until then there’s always letting the cat sleep on me.